Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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