what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
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