question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
