Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
