Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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