? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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