I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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