that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
