..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarcasm needs its own font
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Randomize