if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
