wakey wakey hands off snakey
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
