You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
