your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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