did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
