he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
