i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
COCAINE IS GR8
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
