Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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