in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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