youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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