I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
