ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
