YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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