You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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