OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
