She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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