how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize