it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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