I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
