i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize