I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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