i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
