Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
