we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
