eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
