Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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