dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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