Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
this just has baby written all over it
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
