I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Randomize
