you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
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