who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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