Texts From Last Night

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  (858): View more from California

  I like my sex mixed with concussions.

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  (858): I like my sex mixed with concussions. http://tfl.nu/qysd
  Replies (6) Good night (1089) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.

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  (847): I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore. http://tfl.nu/qnk6
  Replies (32) Good night (1011) Bad night (4804)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.

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  (704): It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States. http://tfl.nu/t1qp
  Replies (16) Good night (6466) Bad night (953)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.

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  (303): It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet. http://tfl.nu/tf1g
  Replies (14) Good night (1026) Bad night (3795)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.

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  (832): I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep. http://tfl.nu/qpw1
  Replies (15) Good night (1621) Bad night (4301)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.

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  (360): just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe. http://tfl.nu/xu32
  Replies (6) Good night (2341) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.

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  (704): My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search. http://tfl.nu/gxvg
  Replies (2) Good night (607) Bad night (2024)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.

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  (832): No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good. http://tfl.nu/yaqd
  Replies (3) Good night (733) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model

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  (850): Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model http://tfl.nu/o9d2
  Replies (5) Good night (1569) Bad night (594)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it

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  (865): I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it http://tfl.nu/0008
  Replies (12) Good night (1544) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.

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  (215): You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you. http://tfl.nu/sg3o
  Replies (7) Good night (1096) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.

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  (336): I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it. http://tfl.nu/1f7k
  Replies (2) Good night (888) Bad night (270)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load

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  (317): There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load http://tfl.nu/2y1d
  Replies (6) Good night (961) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash

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  (330): he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash http://tfl.nu/b2o7
  Replies (0) Good night (610) Bad night (285)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.

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  (714): Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth. http://tfl.nu/x54l
  Replies (3) Good night (621) Bad night (249)

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