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• (425): View more from Washington

  Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.

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  These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (315): View more from New York

  he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Salt in an open wound right now.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?

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  23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (812): View more from Indiana

  She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?

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• (516): View more from New York

  I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!

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