Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  Get your hand out of your ass!

  (734): View more from Michigan

  how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?

  (650): View more from California

  In your belly button

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  (650): Get your hand out of your ass! (734): how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..? (650): In your belly button http://tfl.nu/hvbh
  Replies (3) Good night (886) Bad night (1150)
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  (714): View more from California

  I need hand sanitizer and jesus.

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  (714): I need hand sanitizer and jesus. http://tfl.nu/r3xx
  Replies (15) Good night (1818) Bad night (2450) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years

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  (303): Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years http://tfl.nu/kvc8
  Replies (6) Good night (517) Bad night (2375) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.

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  (828): I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995. http://tfl.nu/siku
  Replies (17) Good night (2581) Bad night (605) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed

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  (412): my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed http://tfl.nu/3q3u
  Replies (17) Good night (1011) Bad night (4171) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.

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  (415): i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me. http://tfl.nu/4nn8
  Replies (7) Good night (817) Bad night (2865) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.

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  (778): Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper. http://tfl.nu/0up7
  Replies (17) Good night (3829) Bad night (1367) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.

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  (407): How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire. http://tfl.nu/efjw
  Replies (13) Good night (2117) Bad night (1083) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.

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  (423): take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me. http://tfl.nu/qdcc
  Replies (20) Good night (2095) Bad night (820) Order T-Shirt
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  (408): View more from California

  After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.

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  (408): After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex. http://tfl.nu/hxmy
  Replies (20) Good night (1369) Bad night (774) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.

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  (540): I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night. http://tfl.nu/isgy
  Replies (1) Good night (447) Bad night (761) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.

  (713): View more from Texas

  Yeah you should have just let that thought go.

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  (512): He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay. (713): Yeah you should have just let that thought go. http://tfl.nu/ru9t
  Replies (4) Good night (982) Bad night (572)
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  (516): View more from New York

  How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?

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  (516): How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted? http://tfl.nu/oqcu
  Replies (9) Good night (466) Bad night (617) Order T-Shirt
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking

  (815): View more from Illinois

  the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ

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  (507): Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking (815): the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ http://tfl.nu/al4m
  Replies (5) Good night (1054) Bad night (228)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.

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  (908): She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears. http://tfl.nu/al07
  Replies (1) Good night (261) Bad night (495) Order T-Shirt

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