i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
