Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
