The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
We had to coat check the pizza.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
