i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
wanna go halves on a baby?
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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