boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
