the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize