She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
