I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize