Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He better not be in your backpack
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Randomize
