is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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